Oh, it’s over. The challenge is over, with myself as the shining victor. In the end it wasn’t even an argument over whether a Styrofoam cup constituted a dish, Joel left plenty of evidence to convict himself. Really, it’s like his intent was a solid, undeniable loss.

Exhibit A: Dish one from the coffee table, with the remains of Carl’s, Jr. fries and ketchup.

Exhibit B: The remains of a pizza crust (Nicole’s)

Exhibit C: Napkin, remains of Pizza sauce

Exhibit D: A dish left in the sink. Good intentions count for nothing

Even as I’m writing this, Joel is completely unaware of his defeat:

(11:32:51) Joel Conary: many blog worthy events last night/ this morning?
(11:35:16) Me: there’s a couple that could be considered blog worthy
(11:35:20) Me: but one in particular
(11:35:27) Me: you’ll see, it should be up soon
(11:35:40) Joel Conary: dammit. nicole wouldn’t t3ll me either

But he’ll know very soon.

Sometimes I feel the heat of the flames, the cruel tang of battery acid and rubber tires stinging the inside of my nostrils. Sometimes I feel the hair of two dogs under my arms, trying desperately to leap out of my control to establish their control elsewhere because they’re scared of 65 mph bright lights in darkness, a dusk in Anaheim on fire. Sometimes I feel utterly alone in entropy, staring at the wreckage of my car.

And then I wake up and realize that was months ago.

Last week, I got eaten alive by a mosquito. I had two bites on my lip, one on my side, one on my neck, one on my forehead, one on my thigh. The two on my lip were the worst; my lips were numb and swelled up to a size that made me very much not want to go to school, particularly because it happened the morning of the first day of two that I was going to be high-profile: giving tours of the GrC department and the Screen Printing lab.

Going to the health center on Friday afternoon was nice, particularly with the doctor saying "You just need to learn to not be so delicious!" Ahhhh, taste me, I’m delicious! But they gave me Allegra, which has helped.

Giving tours of the screen printing lab all day during Open House was fun, but tiring. I swear, I must have given the same spiel maybe 30-40 times. My throat was definitely hoarse by the end of it.

The best part about it, though, was when I was showing the light table we image screens on to a seven year old, and he looked at me and said "What if you were to look straight into the lightbulb when it goes off?"

I look at him, and I say in my most menacing voice: "Your eyes would liquifyyyyeeeee. It would be like a science experiment gone wrong."

I miss telling the youth a bunch of untruth. Particularly teasing my little sister. Definitely miss that.

And it rains again. This time, in the city of angels.

Hanging out with Abe for a couple of days has been definite good times... I really felt like I had to get the heck out of Dodge after finals week finished. I was getting... restless and bored.

I’ll be arriving back on the Central Coast tomorrow, helping Kristen move back from her victory over the UCLA educational system.

Ciao.

It seems I just left this place, and I can’t wait to go back. I’m quiting my job specifically to lower my stress level, which may indirectly allow me to visit my home more. My sister is getting married there in 3 weeks, so I will be back soon enough.

God knows, I can’t wait.

I’m tired and I wanna go home.

I spent most of the day unpacking and rearranging stuff in my room, returning the bed to its proper position, and unpacking the metric ton of crap in my suitcase and backpack. During this time Cory bombarded Sean and I with questions concerning our journeys. We saw a movie (?Arry Potta? was quite entertaining) and went to a few bars that night to further facilitate the telling of our tales.

My birthday is on the 5th (coolness), and it should be fun after I finish getting my teeth filled. I made a dentist appointment a million years ago and didn?t realize it was on my b-day until later. I didn?t reschedule because I had already pissed off my dentist once by missing my last appointment, I didn?t want to press my luck.

I?m going to try and contact all of my ex-shipmates very soon so that we can have a reunion party/ies, but I have been running into difficulties using the internet (grrrrr). I am greatly anticipating maintaining the friendships I developed on the ship here in SLO.

I?ll also be calling New Frontiers, my old work, soon. I have to see if they have an opening for me. I am beyond sure that they?d take me back, but they may not have a spot for me. I?m not worried though. I can always find another job, and I have some money I can coast on for awhile.

I am still in the process of cleaning up my room. It?s going to take several more hours of solid work.

Nothing was broken while in transit which I am very grateful for. I can?t wait to enjoy some of the best green tea in the world with my new tea set (something I picked up in Korea). I also got plenty of new T-shirts to wear. Cory seems very pleased with the gift I gave him, a Russian military pocket watch of authentic design.

I?ve started to get in contact with my social group here in SLO again. I am amazed at how many people have been regularly reading this journal. It?s a very big compliment and I am glad that so many people found it useful. Just as a reminder, now that I am home I can read any comments posted on the journal. Feel free to post now that I?ll actually be able to read your comments. I might even respond to some of them.

I?ve been feeling pretty good . . . very good since I?ve returned for a variety of reasons. I?ll explain what they are and my feelings about the trip as a whole in my next and possibly final entry (bum bum BUMMMM!).

The ship had to leave Naha a day early because of a typhoon warning (suck). After we left the harbor we hit the edge of the approaching typhoon. For a little while waves were crashing over the bow, even over the bridge (four levels above the main deck). Things were flying off of tables, and tables and chairs were sliding across the floor. Unfortunately the weather decks (outside) were secured so I wasn’t able to experience the waves directly.

Everyone was tired from the previous day and made sick by the waves (I was nauseous for a half hour), so nobody did anything for the whole day.

Played another game of Castle Risk (so much different than normal Risk), and after an amazing defense against overwhelming odds I lost (again). Sigh.

Right before I was about to go to bed, someone told me to check out a lightning storm outside. Purple lightning was flashing through the clouds and forking toward the water. As the ship passed under the thunderhead stars began to peak out between gaps in the clouds, lots of stars. The bioluminescence (which occurs ever night in the wake of the ship) not only included the usual dancing points lights, but large rippling pulses. Light seemed to resonate through strands of white foam in the water(never seen that before). Then the moon rose from beneath the clouds off the port side of the ship. More stars came out as the sky continued to clear and lightning continued to flash in the thunderheads after we left them far behind. It was a dreamscape, unreal.


My description of the storm we passed by during the evening doesn’t do my memory justice. I was out on the fantail with two friends for hours scanning the surrounding inky darkness. Suddenly a bolt would strike the nearby ocean and everything was saturated by a a blinding purple light. We all screamed and laughed as we waited for the image of the flash to fade from behind our closed eyes. My two friends had there cameras with them. They would wait with their shutters open to try and catch a bolt on film. I don’t know if any of their pictures ever came out.

The affect of the huge masses of clouds passing overhead amongst dense patches of stars, the exaggerated brilliance of the plankton passing along the ship and the irregular but frequent purple lightning convinced my senses that I was no longer sailing on the pacific, but somewhere else beyond the realm of the physical or the understandable.

I slept in for three hours after quarters (formation). After that a large group of the kids and I went to the Korean Maritime Academy. They have two training ships their (each is a little smaller than ours, but they’re newer). The newest one was purchased a year and a half ago. It was spotless. On board were large wood-paneled classrooms, comfortable six bedroom suites, and a double bridge. A training bridge sits directly behind the ship’s bridge.

After the tour we played soccer, volleyball, and basketball. I played a little soccer but was only successful in falling down and scraping the crap out of my left hand and shin. I was kinda pissed off about that. There were so many California kids that we had to play with lots of substitutes, and the game was only half as long as a regular game. It was fun to watch though. The game ended up being a tie (1-1).

We won basketball and volleyball. I kicked butt in volleyball (and hit a wicked spike). So I felt a little better. The Koreans were extremely polite and friendly.

After that I went out with some friends. First we hit the bank (a bank that actually accepted my check card). Then we found a real teahouse. I sampled some of the proprietors delicious products (Korea supposedly has the best green tea in the world).

After that we ate a cool restaurant where the food was cooked in a charcoal grill in the middle of the table. Then we met some friends and took over a little Karaoke lounge. It was a blast.


It took most of the day to find a bank that excepted foreign visa cards. This involved many hours of walking. This was the first port that I took the taxi regularly. The traffic and taxis were much safer than in Russia, but I heard several stories of taxi drivers taking corners going over 50 mph and using the e-break to drift around turns.

The tea house was an unexpected find. While wandering the streets of Mokpo I ran into a friend who showed it to me. The owner was a young women (of course it’s hard to tell since all Asian women look young) who spoke some english set a table for my friends and I with tea and snacks (little rainbow-colored rice crackers). The tea was extra good because she put some kind of thickener into it.

I think at least twenty of us, probably more, crammed into that Karaoke room. It was a large room though with lots of couches, several tables, a huge TV, and a unending supply of snacks and drinks supplied by the host (who would drop occasionally to refill the snack trays and pitchers) all for one hourly rate. The whole time everybody danced while four or five people stood next to the TV and screamed whatever song was being displayed. I screamed myself horse singing ’Welcome to the Jungle’. After a little while on of my shipmates marched around the room and took all of the guys’ shirts off. Eventually everyone was dancing, shirtless, all over the room (even on top of the tables). It was a blast.

Today didn’t start out as a very good day. I got up early to finish some physics homework (which, it turns out, I didn’t need to do), and wasn’t conscious until after lunch (which I went to after a nice long nap).  I spent most of the day studying for my big test tomorrow (which was supposed to be today but got postponed).

I was in a bad mood for most of the day because I am still a tiny bit sick, and because I got in a little bit of trouble for something stupid. I couple days ago a list was posted near the messhall. On it was everyone’s name and a number that indicated how they were getting home form Hawaii. I had to talk to Sean about what our plan was so I didn’t sign it immediately, in fact I forgot to sign it. So, this morning I had to go see the PDO (personal development officer) and he told me that I have Captain’s Mast in a week or two. That’s where you appear in front of the captain and some officers and they go through this whole performance which results in you getting a couple of hours extra duty.

It’s really not a big deal, but I absolutely hate it when something harmless results in a disproportionately grave consequence (like loosing a toenail when you stub a toe). Anyway, I was pissed off all day, but by the afternoon I felt better. The whole anxiety trip that has been bugging me for the past week or so seemed to have burned it self out. Sometimes you just have to feel crappy to get over feeling crappy.


So I am feeling a little more comfortable today, I think I’ll be feeling the same way tomorrow.

I took lots of naps during the trip. The constant rocking motion made it very easy to crash. Plus I never knew exactly when the next time I?d have the oppurtunity to nap.

My smile feels rather toothy today, and I am glad.

After over seven years I have a full set of teeth again.

Today, as I passed the gas station, there was a fleet of four red PT Cruisers fueling up. One of those minutes I wished I had my camera. Cracked me up.

Never let a girl like me get bored. Tonight, no homework, taking a break from blanket making (sister Suzie’s birthday present), I painted my finger nails silver-white, not bad, good color with my skin. However, being bored, I added a crimson racing stripe to each of them, quite distracting. Also there is no remover in this house, so I am stuck for a bit. Maybe they will make me type faster. Zoom!

Lastly, I chopped my hair off. Cute so far, lets see how it handles when I have no time to deal with it in the morning. Good stylist, I might keep this one.

Well, it finally happened. Shit this is weird-- single.

the time had come the walrus said
to speak of many things
of shoes and ships and sealing wax
of cabbages and kings
and why the sea is boiling hot
and whether pigs have wings



Oh! Completely unrelated, I promise, new icon. It makes me cackle.

Well, I made it back alive from Mexico around 1:30 last night. Had a great time, brought back two watches that claim to be Gucci, but I know better. Also brought back an undesired neck hickey, and now I have stories to tell. However, you want to hear them we will have to speak in person, because that is so very much better.

I am feeling a desperate want for a peanut butter blended mocha with extra chocolate. Wow, that would be good, coffee, peanut butter, chocolate and frozen like a milkshake, yummm. Maybe I should make peanut butter mocha cookies, maybe I should do my homework, maybe I should go talk to the coffee stand girl...

I want to cook Friday, I was thinking Mexican food. There is something inherently wrong with me cooking Mexican for myself however, so here’s what I need from you.
A Kitchen-- I much prefer to cook in kitchens that are not mine, strange, I know, but it works. Besides my house sucks. However this means that you will be playing minor host, I’ll help don’t worry.
Eaters-- I tend to cook for many people, hence I need many people to eat my food, at least 4 would be good, but more would be even better.

If you want to hang out with me while I am cooking, you can learn how to make yummy yummy food.

That is all, respond and eat!

So, you know I am a unique person, and that my personality is a bit different, but I don’t harm anyone, so what’s the worry, right?
I think I actually have a real problem. As I was going through my bed time routine this evening, I realized how unhinged I actually am. Brushing my teeth, getting water twice (once for tonight, once for tomorrow’s water bottle), making sure I have my apple, setting my 6 alarms, picking out my clothing (then changing my mind about the socks, and having to find new socks that matched better), remembering my keys, lock, and bike clothes, remembering my notebooks and book, brushing my hair, double checking the front door, triple checking my alarms, finding my book, packing my back-pack, and lastly going through my mental checklist to make sure I remembered everything. Neurosis, you are my friend. Once, just once, I would like to fall asleep worry-free and without spending an excessive amount of time going through the process. Gah, goodnight.

happiness is:

-a hot girlfriend, some cool friends, and a night away from the mundane
-dancing in your underwear in someone elses’ living room
-finding someone new to geek out with, and learn from while teaching to
-remembering why you are fiercely in love with your life
-going to see The Life Aquatic, and Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas as a double feature
-Mac and Jacks African Amber Ale
-a warm gun
-realizing that your prof that you are the Worst Student Ever isn’t a fatal condition
-plotting summer mischief
-having a resume that you are actually proud of, both in content and presentation
-Hardcore Spooning
-having duct tape when it is needed the most
-actually feeling tired, for the first time in ages, and being able to sleep

in the past month, I’ve had at least two dreams which involve me getting shot (once by disgruntled rastafarians having angry words with my grandmother). Last night, I threw up twice (dreamwise) from anxiety of losing my camera/laptop bag. I don’t recall having dreams this visceral or vivid in recent memory.. wonder what’s up.

Antarctica personal statement shall be finished today.

So, by my own diagnosis, I have strained or pulled my left Flexor Pollicis Brevis. I’m chalkng this up to repetitive strain, from two highly important tasks I perform during the average day as of late:

-Pipetting. my lab work consists of being able to repeatedly and rapidly pipet and transfer ~10 microliters of liquid in a precise manner, through use of a pipetman. Pipetmen are controlled by slow, steady thumb pressure, namely, by the Flexor Pollicis Brevis.

-Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas. Beth’s neighbors/housemates have GTA:SA. It is beautiful. It is fun. It is decadent. It is something I will incessantly play, even when I should be doing other things, like paying attention to the sexy redhead nibbling on my earlobe and humping my leg. I use my Flexor Pollicis Brevis to drive my vehicle and maneuver my homeboy CJ Johnson through his hood, while cappin’ bitches and slappin’ hoes.


So yes. I have a repetitive strain injury from analysis of protein interactions with polymers, and from excessive carjacking. I wonder if I can get a Syndrome named after me, or at least a journal article...

In other news, I’m flying to florida saturday night for some family business. I’ll be online, of course, but on the wrong coast. Family drama is to be expected, but such is life. Maybe I’ll get around to reading some of these grand books I’ve accrued and accreted in the past few weeks, and posting some of several hundred photos of the past few months.

There’s blood in my mouth because I’ve been biting my tongue all week.

There is some serious hacker irony in using an intercepted, unsecured wireless signal to arrange a visit to Bletchley Park tomorrow.

Family situation is better. I also leave on tuesday afternoon. dagoski I arrive on british airways # BA0069 tuesday night. All told, this has been a good trip, but I’m looking forward to sitting still for a bit, once I hit washington. That might not be happening much either, though...